John Oliver Comedy Script Samples

I reached out to John Oliver’s people for a shot at a writing post on his HBO series. They sent me a “submission packet.”

The packet requested: Two “headline news” segments (national & international news); also requested were two outlines for more-detailed segments (which could include roving reporters, video, and so on) covering same.

I was given about 36 hours to conceive, write, edit, and submit all of the below. And it was December 30th. Sooo…yeah…no pressure.

In spite of what I think is some very strong — and sharp — satire, I didn’t make the cut. Damn travesty, I say. But I’m biased. The following is what I sent (warning: naughty words abound!)…


In an announcement that surprised
viewers and critics across our
Puritanical nation, Duck Dynasty
chief red neck and good, duck-murdering
Christian, Phil Robertson, announced that
he disapproves of gays and that
homosexuality is a sin.
It really was quite a shock – he
seemed so open-minded at the Ninth
Annual Beard-Pulling Finals.

GFX Image: A Truck Pull event, Duck Dynasty’s Robertson, his
beard looped around front bumper of a truck, they’re in a tug
of war.

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Dumé Jones, a hard-bitten P.I. in 1960s MEPHISTOPOLIS — HORROR tale

Mephistopolis is a literary horror novel with strong fantasy elements, weaving the tale of the city’s leader, The Abandoner, through the stories of people from all walks of life who are mysteriously drawn to the city, unknowingly given a chance to atone for their sins.

Mephistopolis takes us on many personal journeys, poses to the reader the question “What is evil?” (And questions the ideas [and ideals] of religion.)

Mephistopolis is available on Barnes & Noble (no nook or Kindle needed:

Another chapter is here: CLICK!

This story takes place in Mephistopolis in the 1960s. It’s a crime noir tale, one of many genres the book utilizes in telling the city’s story.

Dumé Jones, P.I.

            Mephistopolis was a town zooming toward a major growth-spurt.  What happened at this time altered much about the city’s control, the city’s future, the city’s life and citizenry.

Who’s to blame for this?  Who’s the one who could so powerfully alter the course of the harsh city?  Some say it was the devil himself. . .

But they would be laying that blame incorrectly.

Either way, there’s no denying that when the smartly dressed black man—his red running shoes notwithstanding—blew into town on this day, in a decade remembered for rock ‘n’ roll and poodle skirts, Mephistopolis went to Hell in a hand basket.

And that’s saying quite a lot. Continue reading ‘Dumé Jones, a hard-bitten P.I. in 1960s MEPHISTOPOLIS — HORROR tale’


Guys Are Disgusting & So Very Dense (Women Are Crazy And Make No Sense)

The following are the covers and a few select pages from Guys Are Disgusting & So Very Dense (Women Are Crazy And Make No Sense) — also known as Women Are Crazy And Make No Sense (Guys Are Disgusting & So Very Dense)….

**PLEASE NOTE: If some images remain as tiny thumbnails upon viewing, simply click an image, then click BACK or RELOAD the page — that usually takes care of it. (If neither of those fixes work, read an essay, they have no pics.)


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Table of Contents

If you’ve landed on the blog’s home page, scroll down for writing samples (film, comics, & more) OR click “Continue reading ‘Table of Contents'” just below for the TOC. Scrolling on the blog landing page gives you brief previews. However, if you were linked directly to the TOC, you’ll just see a list of links…
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Script Sample from Franchise Horror Feature ‘FEAR EVERYTHING’





The rituals you are about to see were merely inspired by
those used in real life.
Actual demonic rituals were not portrayed here in order to
protect everyone involved.

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The following was given the green light from then-editor Denny O’Neil. The idea? What if the Arkham Asylum lunatics from Batman had to fight the Aliens? Awesome, yes? But I needed help to pitch. At that time, some years back now, writing up treatments was NOT my strength (As the man once said, “I’m much better now.”). I asked a veteran writer w/whom I had become friendly — David Michelinie (the guy who created Venom and gave Tony Stark a drinking problem). Lucky us, DC was owed 1 Dark Horse/DC team-up.

David thought it was a great idea, save for one problem: Dark Horse has a rule: All Aliens stories must take place in outer space. So I wrote back: “Easy fix. An unreliable narrator. Maybe it DID take place in space.” And we were off!

From there we wrote up a list of NEW Arkham characters — fodder for the Aliens to kill and maim. I think we cut their names from the final (below), but some included Doc Feces & Don Wand.

Ahem. Sooo, with you caught up and everything in place….

Continue reading ‘ALIENS IN ARKHAM ASYLUM’


X-Men Scripting Test

Some years back, an editor at Marvel Comics was impressed with script samples I sent. As a result, he asked I take a “scripting test.”

I received a Plot—the writers of Marvel Comics often write in plot summaries—and Artwork, and it’s my job to add Dialogue.  He informed me he liked what he saw…just before leaving Marvel forever (honestly, I can’t recall if he left or was laid-off or what).

Below are pages from the comic, sporting its ACTUAL script, accompanied by MY SCRIPT TEST pages. I was told to pick any scene or scenes I wanted to write, up to five pages 10 pages (see the other X-post for clarification).

The Xmen 70 covermain difference between comic books and picture books is that the latter merely describes what’s on a page (“See Jane Run!”; “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish”), while comic books give INSIGHT into the images. So, when we see Peter Parker swinging over the city (i.e., Jane running), the caption might say “As our wily web-swinger careens across our fair Metropolis…” but then there’s insight: “…he wonders about his battle with the unscrupulous Scorpion!” Which, you know, is not shown visually. It’s usually in a thought bubble.

Continue reading ‘X-Men Scripting Test’


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